Do Open Relationships Work?

Do open relationships work?

by cupidlies on August 11, 2010 | Comments CL(8) FB(0)

My boyfriend and I have been together for two years.

Recently, we've been having some issues in our relationship. He suggested that we have an "open relationship".

Before I agree, I wanted to get your opinion. Do you think that having an open relationship is a solution to our problems? Or are we setting ourselves up for even bigger problems down the road?

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Comments

jaeskiee / August 18, 2010 12:36AM

Im confused? what do u mean by open relationship? do u mean he wants to be with you while messin around with others? or does he mean like telling each other everything with no lies?

cupidlies / August 12, 2010 11:07AM

@citysmurf and @sadeyes - some of the issues we're having are very typical in any relationship, we don't do very much like we used to like sex or going out. It's just become somewhat boring, but when we do things, we have a great time. When you've fallen for someone, that doesn't go away so fast. So it's difficult to just walk away.

@MisterMachicote - I actually wanted to understand open relationships more. Do they work? What they even mean? What happens during one? I've never been in one so I'm not sure if they make sense.

@Moremuscles - Let me guess, you've messed around with someone while being with someone else? Kinda like @onelove's situation?

MisterMachicote / August 12, 2010 10:12AM

Sorry, Wait. Opinion spelled those wrong.

MisterMachicote / August 12, 2010 10:09AM

He clearly wants to get it in with someone. Might not be a good idea.....ummm waite. How do you feel bout this? Are you asking cause you think it might be a good idea and just want a second opnion? Let us know?

onelove / August 12, 2010 9:48AM

After my ex cheated on me several times, she pretty much wanted to just be in an open relationship. But the problem was, I was content with just her. I didn’t need to mess with anyone else. And I felt like it was just a way for my ex to have others and have me too (greedy bitch).

What’s interesting is that when I started talking to others, she always expressed jealousy. Eventually, I believe this is the true reason that our relationship ended, not so much that she cheated on me.

Ultimately, if there are any emotions (especially growing emotions), I don’t think open relationships work. It’s just a term used to make it OK to cheat. One of the persons usually end up catching feelings. Or as @citysmurf said, one may find someone else. Just be single and just mess around.

Moremuscles / August 11, 2010 5:10PM

Open relationships work because you dont feel the pressures of being in a relationship and you can really find out if you guys should be together. Anyone want to me in a open relationship with me for a case study?

sadeyes / August 11, 2010 3:34PM

Very true.. you really need to figure out why the term open relationship is being said!. To me that is a way out!. You really dont want a commitment with anyone, so why bother with the other person.

citysmurf / August 11, 2010 1:56PM

Both good questions, but i'd have to know you both or know more about the dynamics of your relationship to answer them. i've personally seen open relationships that flourish because each one gets to experience the thrill of the dating seen but always has someone to love and cuddle with at the end of the day. on the other hand, i can imagine that it might end in one of the individuals falling in love with someone new and ending it altogether. you've already said you want to agree, but are you doing it just to keep him in your life? if he's on his way out, there's no real stopping him, but maybe in suggesting this "open relationship" he's finding a way to pull back without actually facing the issues that you guys have and should be working on.